Well, New Years, was, New Years. Had dinner at Grandmas after I called in back up to do my hair and then went to Kari and Adams. Got there and Nick, Kari, Adam, Aubrey, Kayla and Mike were all boozing it up. Kayla and Chels and I played Suites, the new Cranium game, cant remember the name of game and Shag, Marry and Kill. All entertaing games. I think were the night went wrong was Suites. It was the last game we played and didnt finish. I was drinking Bacardi O and felt quite well till my 5 millionth bath room trip that night when I looked in the mirror and saw that not only were my cheeks red, but my forehead looked like I had the chicken pocks. I went and asked Chels and Kayla and Amber what the deal was and they told me to go sit outside, my face was burning. Like, lightning blot scar style. So, I sit outside but I cant feel the cold air on my face, but, the rest of my body is freezing. I come back in and my face is hotter then it was and people are starting to get concerned. I was all, yeah, me and my chicken pocks are going to lie down. So, I go into Kari and Adams room and lay down and all these people follow me. Chels and Kayla take the bed with me and we started to watch the MTV count down show. Adam comes in with a fan and he and Kari decide that I had too much to drink too quickly and the sugar was giving me a hard time. A sort of allergic reaction of sorts. Adam said it had happened to Kari a few times before as well. So, then, Nick walks in and is all, I hear someone in here is really drunk. Im like, lying on the bed with my pants un buttoned and my black lace undies are hanging out and people just keep coming in. I dont feel bad, Im just SO weirded out that my face is hot and to be truthful, the whole time I was like, face sugar-chicken pocks, go away, your making me look horrible. Im SO shallow. So, this all happens in the last like 10 minutes and its finally midnight. We all kiss and and Jen calls me and I chat with her for a bit before going to the bath room and getting back to the party. We drink some more, make chocolate chip waffles and then Im like, WTF, where is Nick? Come to find out Nick had gone to bed. I was having a panic attack as I was still looking cute since the redness was gone and the only reason for looking cuter then normal was in bed. Well, its not like I could just leave the party and hop into the sack with him. People would see for goodness sakes! So, I go into his room and ask him whats up. He was house sitting and had to be back to the house at 8:00 the next morning to deal with the dogs locked inside all day. It was 2:00 by this time and I just let him sleep after playing with his hair for a while. So, I go back to the party and my fellow partiers had turned into buzz killers and had pulled out the extra bed and were watching the South Park movie. WHAT the HELL. Every time I leave people turn into downers. So, after much bitching I give in and go to bed. Even though I am a most spectacular bitcher (see Tashas Tag board...) I couldnt get people back to doing what I wanted to be doing. Drinking. Hehehe, instead things winded down and as I changed into my pajamas I started to feel tired. Long story short I CRASHED hard core like 2 minutes into the movie. I woke up this fine morning of the first at 7:15 to see Adam and Nick leaving to take Nick home. I wanted to get up with the cover story of getting water to say bye. I wanted to hug Nick. I didnt. I just sat there thinking of things I could do and I watched them leave. I think Nick returns to school the same day I do, the 5th. I dont think I will see him again. I really want to. And its not just me saying that. I feel like I really want to. This is new for me. After Eli and Sterling and Dan and Dylan I want to see Nick. Well F that. Now its going to turn into one of those what could have been thing and he will go back to school and find some other girl. I want to know how much he likes me; I want to know what he thinks of me. I just want to know. So, now, Im here, watched a few DVDs, talking to Tasha when she is not dissing on me or talking about blah blah Faramir blah blah ;) and I dont know what to do with myself.

Its snowing. A shit ton. Anyone want to come shovel me out?
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